Last weekend Shortie came with me down to the O.C. I feared Shortie would be disappointed since we would be hitting happy hour and I would probably be asleep by 9 or 10pm.
My weekends consist of having a few drinks, sleep, get up early walk the boards, sleep, beach time, sleep, happy hour, sleep. So I think you get the point. At the beach Red gets some serious relax/sleep time.
After last weekend I’ve been unable to catch up on my sleep since Shortie and I ended up closing the bars both Friday and Saturday night.
Shortie and I arrived and immediately went over to Macky’s to try and grab a table for when Mom and Dad joined us. I ordered Da Bucket of Orange Crush figuring Shortie would not be able to taste the alcohol. She rarely drinks and when she does its usually because it doesn’t taste like alcohol. Da Bucket grabbed the attention of the table of guys next to us and so the dialogue began.
The Folks joined us but only stayed for a few drinks before Shortie and I ordered our second Bucket. As soon as they left we were pulled into this group of guys and quite literally because they picked up our table and brought it over to theirs.
We had fun hanging with them at Mackey’s and soon they were off to Fager’s Island and asked us to go too. Shortie and I agreed we needed to clean up first since we had no make up on and were in our crappy driving clothes.
I had never been to Fager’s Island and didn’t know what to expect but it was like walking through a jungle to get to the front door. I was surprised to find it had an older crowd but that changed later in the evening. First thing was first and I ordered Shortie and I each an Orange Crush to keep the alcohol flowing in our systems. We hadn’t walked five feet before we bumped into the guys. The first thing they noticed was my glass was nearly empty (yes, already). Shortie piped up and said, “Why haven’t any of you bought her another one yet?”
Before I knew it I had another Orange Crush in my hand and then the night really got started. There was more alcohol and things got a little fuzzy. With that much alcohol we couldn’t help but shake our groove thing. I don’t know how long we were out on that dance floor but it was a great workout.
Before we knew it the bar was closing and it seems I’ve been doing a lot of that lately after a recent conference in Orlando. I thought for sure I was too old for this but this old chick was kickin it.
Saturday brought the hangover, time on the wave runner and sleeping on the beach. We were ready by 5 and headed to Fish Tales to meet up with WW, his girlfriend and her two daughters. They lasted til about 8 before the girls were done and they scooted them back to the hotel.
So we headed back to the condo so we could walk to Seacrets. Seems there were all sorts of friends at the beach that weekend and the plan was to meet up with them at Seacrets. I hadn’t seen Chrissy in YEARS and her and her hubby had a chance to get out without the kids and Seacrets is a favorite of hers so it wasn’t hard to get her to catch up with us. YDH was in town with his girl and his buddy Al.
Seacrets was packed and most of us were geared up for dancing in the room with the bouncy floor. You just need to stand there and you’ll bounce due to everyone else jumping up and down. The whole night was crazy and after Chrissy left and before YDH left the guys, who walked us home the previous evening, showed up looking for Shortie and I. The night was nearly over and everyone was pretty hammered.
He said to me: “I have the keys and I’m taking you outta here for some alone time. I have a cab waiting outside.”
“There’s a ton of cabs outside… Always, and there’s no way I’m leaving my wing-girl.”
This dude was so drunk he could barely keep his eyes open but he continued, “Come on I’ll have you back in 30 minutes.”
“You’re so drunk you couldn’t even get it up in 30 minutes.”
I had expected him to behave something like this the previous evening but he didn’t, he was a perfect gentleman. At this point he was obviously trying to get some before the weekend was out and you can’t blame a guy for trying. Dude was so drunk and I was pretty snockered so we weren’t going to agree and I wasn’t going anywhere with him. So what do two chicks do in a situation like this? We ditched em. I know pretty juvenile of us but at this point in my life I don’t have to deal with anything that I don’t want to deal with and we were ALL pretty drunk.
Shortie and I hightailed it outta there and back to the condo. I wasn’t even slowed when at some point I accidentally slammed my hand against a wall. I thought I had scraped it up but I didn’t and it was killing me even though I was drunk.
There were numerous calls wondering where we were. Sounding something like “RED! RED! Pick up! Why you do me like that?”
“Pick up“? This isn’t like a home answering machine. I did call back and left a message telling him I just didn’t feel like dealing with his drunk ass.
Sunday brought another hangover but not quite as bad. Shortie and I did some beach time and when the strap from the chair tugged on my hand I nearly hit the roof. I had forgotten about slamming my hand and Shortie and I knew we would have to piece together some of the weekends events on the drive home.
Mom told Shortie she was welcome anytime especially since I seemed to have more fun with her than The Folks. Shortie said, “I don’t know, I seem to get Red into trouble.”
Mom said, “Good!”
1 1/2 oz. Vodka
3/4 oz. Triple Sec
Combine vodka and triple sec in an old fashioned glass filled with ice, fill with orange juice and stir.
**Note: The original post has been modified upon finding out that ALL of those guys ARE married with children including the dawgs who were hitting on Shortie and I. We were unaware of this and want no part of it. I guess our instincts to ditch them were right-on.