So today is my birthday…
I have a few more friends… and a few less.
I am getting so many well wishes on Facebook this morning but among those are the feelings of disgust over the hate in our country.
It’s sad what people do to each other, especially these days. It’s like middle school girls, who can be so cruel.
When I was in middle school I had a group of friends. Jodie was the leader of our pack. She came to me one day and told me she was pregnant. I was always so gullible and so innocent. I had rose colored glasses on and I was always a good girl. So when she told me this I was shocked! I remember thinking “We are in 8th grade and she had sex!”.
She told me not to tell anyone… I didn’t.
That afternoon as I was getting on the bus Jodie came over and screamed at me in front of the entire bus. She accused me of sharing her secret. I was dumbfounded because I DIDN’T! I didn’t tell anyone because I promised I wouldn’t.
Then get this… It was a lie!
She wanted to test me, test my friendship.
I lost all my friends because of her lies. I couldn’t figure out why she would do this to me. What had I done for her to make up all these lies and hurt me.
I wear my heart on my sleeve and people say I share too much. Maybe it because I’m always trying to show I’m not hiding anything. I don’t want to be so falsely accused again. My true feelings I share with friends I trust and it’s hard to find those kinds of friends.
Here I am 49 years old and I feel the scenario above has happened again. I’m in middle school and someone I thought was my friend has made false accusations against me. Accused me of doing something I would never do.
Accusations that are unfounded and just made up in their head. Again, I don’t know what I did to warrant such accusations.
Seems these are time times of hate in our world.
One thing is different this time… I’m not the one who loses. Yes, I lost a dear friend and I’m incredibly sad but I am confident in myself and my values.
“It’s a cruel, (it’s a cruel), cruel summer
Now you’re gone”
Even I am gullible and innocent till now, who wear heart at her sleeves. But the world is so cruel, compelling me to change, to be just like them. Because if you are polite they are gonna use you and and still won’t understand you.. So it’s just make me question – What’s the sue of being nice to anyone. 😕
I’ve decided that being gullible and/or wearing your heart on your sleeves is the better choice. The alternative IMO is some form of cynicism – which isn’t worth it.