When they ask to use your bathroom say NO and send them to the gas station on the corner.

I’m pissed and as some of you know when I’m pissed I tend to sometimes vent here.

This past weekend was Mini Red’s weekend with her Dad except Mini Red was invited to a big party on Saturday.  Her Dad brought her to the party and I was to pick her up after.  There was no sense in her Dad driving all the way back down here to pick her up and have her for less than 24 hrs.  Then again some Dad’s crave to be with their kids and will do anything to be with them.  I looked at this as an opportunity to get Mini Red back early.

Anyhow, Mini Red and her Dad call me and wanted to drop off her stuff.  I thought we had already agreed he would keep it since she would be back there on Tuesday. “No no no Mini Red will need her stuff”, he says.  Well I’m heading out for a day of shopping and this will throw a wrench in my plans.  They say they will drop her stuff at my apartment since Mini Red has her key.

So you’re probably thinking what’s the problem here?  The problem is I don’t want FN in my apartment, especially when I’m not there.  It’s creepy and I feel like he is looking for something.  The first time I allowed him in he was disrespectful and sat on my couch talking non-stop. I know him well enough to know he was trying to nonchalantly get some digs in on me and I refused to acknowledge any of it.  I decided I just didn’t want him in my home again.

Well a year later he was bringing Mini Red home and I allowed him in again.  No biggie this time.  I mean I had just woken up and was in my jammies but I got him out of there as soon as I could.

He has tried to come by the apartment with Mini Red before when I wasn’t here but I was able to get my Mom to pick whatever up and avoid this.  Mini Red knows I don’t want her Dad in my home and even on the phone this time I expressed it, nonchalantly, to him that I didn’t want him in my home.  Well I guess he didn’t get it.

After a full day of shopping I get home and find the toilet is running and that’s when I knew he was in my home.  I know Mini Red and I know she was excited to get to the party and wouldn’t stop to pee.  The gift he helped Mini Red buy for me was under the tree and placed just so.  I knew Mini Red wouldn’t put it there like that.  I suddenly felt violated and how I would think someone would feel after their home was burglarized except nothing was taken.

I picked Mini Red up from her party and confronted her about this and she said, “Yes, Daddy came in he said he had to pee. He said it would be ok”.   I was livid and felt it showed her Dad how much she disrespected me so I immediately called him.  He played dumb, of course like he couldn’t see the problem with this.  I have never been invited in his home nor would I even ask.  Numerous times I’ve had to pee when picking up Mini Red, which is every other Sunday, but I go to the Dunkin Donuts near his home.  I wouldn’t even dare to ask to go in his home.

He then went all drama on my ass saying, “Fine!  I’ll never set foot in Montgomery County again.  How many times do you want me to say I’m sorry?”

He IS the Drama King.  His apology means nothing if he doesn’t understand.  He tried to turn it around on me, which is his usual when he is confronted, and that’s a load of crap.  It’s useless to get my point across now and at least I’ve said my peace so he can’t play dumb and this won’t happen again.

Evidently, when he was at the door Mini Red told him several times I said he couldn’t come in but he assured her it would be ok.  I know Mini Red felt bad about the whole situation but I couldn’t help but get even more angry at FN for doing this to her.

He used the “I have to pee” line to get in. I can’t believe he used this on his own daughter.

Mini Red is feeling bad and I figure this is time for a lesson on Lines Dudes Will Give You.

Not long after my divorce Mini Red and I moved into our own apartment and left my parent’s house.  I had been working at The Company for maybe a year and they were growing by leaps and bounds.  The Company decided to upgrade from IRA SEP accounts to 401ks for the employees.  We were offered opportunities to meet with the 401k guy that was contracted and could do whatever investing with him.  Since he was located in my neck of the woods he and I met for coffee not far from my apartment.  I got some information from him on what I could do with my money as well as hearing about his wife, son and baby-on-the-way.  After our meeting I was walking home and he was walking with me, which I found odd.  I tried to nicely separate and he said he would walk with me since I wasn’t far.  When we got to the door of my building I said goodbye but he used the line “I have to pee could I use your bathroom?”

Ummm, ok”, but I was thinking “Crap how am I gonna lose this guy.  Then again he’s married so he should be harmless, right?”  Boy was I wrong not-to-mention STOOPID and naive.

This asshole came out of the bathroom and next thing I know he’s grabbing me.  I got out of his grips and got him out of my home.  This situation could have gotten bad.

As I’m telling Mini Red this story she asks why I never told her this before.  There is no reason for her to know this until now and not to let it happen to her even if it is her Dad.

As for the 401k dude… I told a friend at work about it and it got back to our CEO.  A memo went out to our company that the 401ks were moved to a different company.  Word is… Our CEO called this guy and told him he didn’t like the way he treated our employees so he was withdrawing all of The Company’s money from him.

The moral of this story girls… Be weary of dudes asking to use your bathroom.


11 comments on “When they ask to use your bathroom say NO and send them to the gas station on the corner.

  1. I’m sorry both of those things happened to you. Your home needs to feel like your last refuge, the last place you feel like people can disrespect you.

  2. What a pair of feckers, glad that 401k guy lost all of the business.

    Seasons Greetings to you and MiniRed, and a Happy New Year when it comes round.

  3. MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Right back at ya Chica! Happy New Year – Red

  4. FN is really a FN. It is really a shame he is Mini Red’s father. Over the last few years listening to FN stories, you almost wonder if he will ever grow up and take some interest in her and your well being. Guess it is too much to ask from a FN.

    Hope Christmas was good. Hope the New Company is going well!!!

    To be honest this is what I expect of FN. At least now he is aware that I don’t want him in my home. Good to hear form you hope you enjoyed your holidays too! – Red

  5. here’s my two cents..
    people like the ex feed off your reaction..
    so you’re giving him what he wants when you wig out ( even if you have a fabulous reason to get upset)
    dont acknowledge that he even came into the house…dont acknowledge most things he does..
    once he stops getting that negative feedback..he’ll stop being so in your face ..
    not fair and not right I know ..
    but christ..
    this is the price you pay for not only boning a creep..but breeding with him.

    Your are right and normally I don’t give him a reaction but now he can’t pretend I don’t want him in my home and it’s one less thing to worry or get bugged about. He can’t play dumb now. I’m almost more irritated he would do that to his daughter. – Red

  6. Happy New Year Red and Mini-Red!!!!!!

  7. What is the world coming to when the can is no longer safe? I too have had a sense of avoidance when it comes to peeing in other people’s homes or having them pee in my bathroom. It’s the most personal room in the house. It’s the only room where you’re certain a bodily function takes place. If you’re like me then being around your ex for any period of extended time is like waterboarding. You just want it to end. I hate using public restrooms but would welcome the opportunity if it saved me from an awkward situation.

    Happy New Year Red. May 2008 exceed all of your hopes and dreams.

  8. I think I’d rather piss myself then piss you off.

  9. Here’s the important question: Did he at least put the seat back down? More importantly, did he bother to put the seat up in the first place?

  10. That’s some bad juju, Red.

    Hope all is well with you and Mini.

  11. […] I was so happy to turn this in.  I tried to take it easy the next day at work and was feeling like the cold was going away.  I got through the day and even met up with a friend that evening.  The next day was Saturday and the goal was to finish up the Christmas shopping I had put on hold.  Christmas was only a few days away and I needed to finish so I could wrap on Sunday because Monday I had to work and Christmas was Tuesday.  But on Saturday I was feeling worse and it all went down hill from there.  It took all day and I was everywhere but I did finish.  This was the Saturday that I also ran into issues with FN. […]

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