We had potluck and the cube decorating contest at work.  I got third place for my decorations and was surprised to get that because I had elfed my director along with the rest of my team and placed them all over my walls. I found it all very amusing because decorating the cube really isn’t my thing and I don’t know what got into me.  My original plan was to Photoshop my Director, as Santa, print it out on one of the plotters so I could hang it outside my cube.  There just wasn’t enough time and he was grateful for that but I’ve threatened to make him Cupid for Valentine’s Day.

 

I left work and headed to Old Town Alexandria to be Squirrely’s Gurl’s guest for her Holiday Party on a Riverboat… Casino style.  It just happens it’s my former company’s party so I knew most of the people there.  Hardly saw Squirrely Gurl at all while I reconnected with old co-workers.  Tried my hand at Craps but just wasn’t getting it.

The boat docked around 9PM and Squirrely Gurl and I headed to Flanagan’s Harp and Fiddle in Bethesda to see/hear Scythian.  Mrs. M and her crew were already there and as Squirrely Gurl and I pulled up we saw Shortie heading in with two boys.  Who are those boys?  We found Rock Star parking and headed in to join everyone.  The crowd was rocking and everyone was having a great time.  I loved it!  Scythian really knows how to rock the house Celtic Holiday style. A good time was had by all and I have to say my favorite part of the entire day was bumping into someone I hadn’t seen in a long time and meeting his son.  It was too brief but it was great to see you!

It was getting late and the day had been full so I made sure Squirrely Gurl had a way home and I called it an evening.

This morning I got the following email from Shortie on the rest of the evening after I left.

“So I will set this all up for ya.

You bring in all of Squirrely Gurl’s stuff, plus the shoes and are on your way.  This tall well dressed bald man comes up to me and starts talking.  Tells me I am very attractive, yada yada…. Wants to know my name (I tell him Tall Girl), wants to know where I live (he guesses Arlington, weird) and what I do….I tell him IT, he calls me a computer geek.   So he asks if he can take me out some time and if I am single.  He asks for my number, then email, and then gives me his card.  All the while Squirrely Gurl and I are making faces at each other (while she is trying not to fall off the stool).  God only knows where Boy1 and Boy2 are, but I know they are watching this whole thing.  Turns out he is a piano teacher….not what I was expecting but hey.  So one of his friends comes over (Scythian has gone a little country on us) and the dude starts clogging or something.  All I noticed was the 80s loafers and the red socks.  He is swing and groovin all over the place.  Arms and hands coming dangerously close to whacking Boy1 and Boy2 who have been up against the windows.  The next song comes on “The Kiss”, I tell Squirrely Gurl and the boys we can leave right after this is done.  So I am standing there doing my thing when another dude grabs me and starts twirling me.  Really, what!  Next the creepy guy with the long hair comes by, stops, backs up and looks at me.  He goes, “you look happier tonight”.  I say, “I have friends with me tonight.” 

It is time to get the hell out.

Leave Harp and Fiddle.  Squirrely Gurl is searching through her stuff cause she can’t find her phone (oh no, not the phone).  The boys are half a block a head and Boy1 is singing, badly at the top of his lungs.  Squirrely Gurl, thank God, finds her phone.  We get to the car….and it starts.  The boys are singing and quoting Frost, Shakespeare and I think they think Thoreau.  So we are heading back, I’m following my GPS, cause I want to avoid G-Town tonight.  We pull up to a light, the guys next to us are dancing, and I lock the windows.  Squirrely Gurl, Boy1 and Boy2 all want to put the windows down so they can, I have no idea, talk, make fun, yell……who knows.  So we are heading down Mass or Conn Ave and the boys are giving me turn by light by car directions….wonderful.  Heading towards Dupont Circle.  Get up to the circle, construction, no circle access.  U-turn back up the street.  Don’t know what I am going to do…..make a right go down a few blocks, make a right head back into the city…..F@#$% A back at the freakin circle, and sorta blocked again.  The peanut gallery has figured it out too and is cursing the construction and as Adam would say “kirking out”.  I go left, the opposite way on the circle to get around the cones and back on to the circle.  Thank goodness, now we can keep moving.  Boy1 who hasn’t been in DC in a very long time is being a complete tourist, loving every building we pass.  We get on 14th and he sees the Washington monument.  Gets waaaaaaay too excited.  So Squirrely Gurl and I point out that coming up on the left he will be able to see the capital.  I thought he was going to get out of the car (good thing my car auto locks everyone in).  We are on 1 heading toward Squirrely Gurl’s when everyone announces they have to pee…..great, can you hold it 15 minutes more……sure.  Get to Squirrely Gurl’s, the boys are doing their pee pee dance and ask to use Squirrely Gurl’s…..everyone out.  

I have to say that has been one of the more interesting drives home.  Squirrely Gurl was cracking me up and the boys were in their own world.  I felt like a mother on carpool duty.  Home by 2 am and to work before 8 am, I am going to need a nap this afternoon.  TGIF.

We need to hang out more……maybe after Christmas.  I will be home on the 28th and I have no plans for the rest of the so called holiday season…..
Love ya, miss ya
Shortie“

One of the best things I did to prepare for last night was to bring a change of shoes. It was a wonderfully full day but I woke up this morning to the realization that my stomach doesn’t quite agree and my feet are mad because I didn’t switch to the flats soon enough.  Working will be difficult today.

Note: Be sure to check back for photos to be added

View from my room

It was non-stop from the time we arrived.  Get this… There were 38 wedding parties staying at our hotel (Chicago Hyatt Regency).  That is one HUGE Hotel!

Friday was the Cubs game and I got to see Soriano hit a homer and break the tie to lead the Cubs to a win against the Phillies.  Wahoo!  But damn it was hot and chivalry doesn’t exist at Wrigley Field when the Cubs are doing well… I don’t blame em.

Wrigley Field

Friday Night we headed out to Howl at The Moon, a piano bar, for the combination Bachelor/Bachelorette party.  A good time was had by all.

Saturday, three of us girls were at brunch when five fire trucks showed up at the building across the street.  We had the perfect seats to check out the Hot Chicago Firemen.  Ends up it was a false alarm.

Chicago Firemen with Marina Towers in the background

We did a lot of running around  that day doing preparations before heading to the Rehearsal and the Rehearsal Dinner at Greek Islands.  On the way to dinner we got stuck in traffic but I now know where I want to go next time I’m in town:

The Crying Deaf Stripper?

The Crying Deaf Stripper ?  Sounds like something from one of Mad Cabbie’s stories.

After dinner five of us shared a cab back to the hotel where everyone met up at the Big Bar.  In the cab four of us chicks were in the back and we had one dude with us.  We over heard the Cabbie and dude talking and all we got was dude saying, “So you like it rough?”.  On that Mrs. M immediately closed the little window separating the front from the back.  We were howling and repeated the line to dude the rest of the night but he insisted it was innocent enough.

SUNDAY! SUNDAY! SUNDAY! The Wedding Day!

That morning was incredibly crazy.  Our bridesmaid dresses were full length.  The bottom was three layers with the bottom layer having crinlin, this got a bit hot.  The top was sleeveless and low cut.  Those of us with a bigger bust had concerns about our cleavage in church.

See!

I’m not gonna show her cleavage but I must say it was impressive.  Even Jimmy said so.

By the time we got on the boat we were all overheated again.  The top of the boat had the sun beating down and the A/C hadn’t really kicked in down below.  But then I noticed it… The bow of the boat.  So I headed out there and it was heaven.  There were a few Greek women out there and I just lifted my dress a bit to let the wind help cool me off.  They thought I was funny and offered to take my picture for me.

It was windy.

The food was wonderful and the views were amazing especially as the sun was going down.

See the Hancock Bldg?

What a Beautiful Scene!

The Happy Couple and Red

I had the hardest time getting nighttime photos but some turned out beautiful.  I’ll have to work on that.

And last but not least I have to post a pic of my roomie and I.

Roomies

For quite sometime I have been considering moving to Chicago.  I’ve never lived anywhere else but Maryland and would love to have the experience of a different city.  Being in Chicago exacerbated this and all my Chicago friends egged me on big time.  Since being back, which hasn’t been long, I’ve done some serious contemplating about the move and I’ve made a decision.

I can’t move… Yet!

I’m going to do my best to keep Minnie Red in her school and with her friends through High School.  Then I’ll move to Chicago.  It’s only five years away and then I won’t have to worry about what school district I’m in and I’ll get a trendy loft in downtown Chicago.  I’ll only be 45 and I’ll run with the young’uns.  Brotha-Man and SIL can visit and I’ll take Brotha-Man and The King to Wrigley Field.

Ok, so I digressed…

The wedding was beautiful and everyone had a ton of fun and made new life long friends.  Nicole and Louis waited six years to do this and they definitely did it RIGHT!

Thanks for including me in your special day.  I’m honored.

Nicole and Louis are FINALLY getting married this weekend after being together for 6 years and engaged for three.

Anyone that has ever planned a wedding let alone just been in a wedding knows how stressful it can be.  The stress doubles when a good portion of the people attending the wedding are coming from out of town.  The weekend has been planned and everyone is excited for all the events. 

One of the biggest events planned, besides the wedding itself, is The Cubs game on Friday.  I know I have been dying to get to Wrigley Field and right now The Cubs are doing so well.  I hate to note that our two local teams, Nationals and Orioles, aren’t doing nearly as well this year.  The game should be exciting.

Except…. for the big OOPS!

Last night Nicole was working on the welcome bags for the out-of-towners, the wedding date (August 31st) is all over them.  She switched gears to go purchase The Cubs tickets for Friday and when the confirmation page came up she nearly had a heart attack.  She inadvertently purchase $1400 worth of Cubs tickets for the date, and time, of her Wedding. 

Her stress level is already at an all time high and this was not what she needed.  So Louis walks in right at that moment and rather than panic he handles it very calmly.  I guess I should mention they are also paying for their wedding.  They immediately send an urgent email to Stub Hub and Louis called first thing this morning.  Stub Hub tells them “Too bad so sad we can’t help you.”

UNBELIEVABLE!  They won’t even switch the day for them.  For heavens sake it’s $1400 and it not like they would be out the money…. They just needed the tickets for a different day.

So as you can imagine the stress level has raised to Threatcon Orange.  The emails are flying around Chicago to see if they can sell the tickets.

My co-worker suggested I send an email to The Cubs so I did.  Not sure what they can do but they should be aware of these practices of Stub Hub.  I’m just amazed that in this day and age companies can be so rigid and money hungry.

I had never heard of Stub Hub before but that is a company I would rather not deal with.  Would you?

August has been jam packed and it isn’t over yet.  The wedding in Chicago is this weekend and I haven’t even packed yet.  At least I did grab Mrs. M’s and my bridesmaid dresses and mailed them. Gawd I hope nothing goes wrong with that… I paid enough so it shouldn’t.

I finally replaced my running shoes.  I was having shin splints and finally realized the bottom of the shoe was almost worn through.  When I went in the store yesterday I got the distinct feeling the girl wanted to slap me.  I got the lecture on how I could have hurt myself and I have to look at the bottoms of the shoes once in a while.  Not sure when I’ll be getting out there to run again but I should be bouncing down the road with these new shoes.

Minnie Red started 8th grade today.  Jeeze!  I remember when she was in 6th grade and pointing out the 8th graders at the bus stop.  Now she’s one of them.  I took her shopping last night for an outfit for the first day of school.  She choose a mini skirt ensemble and I was happy to see she wore shorts underneath this morning.  I drove her to the bus stop and she promptly shooed me away because she is an 8th grader now and too cool to have Mom hanging around.

With any luck I’ll finish the video I’m making, for the Bride and Groom, tonight.  Then I’ll be able to plans some outfits and pack.  Mrs. M is already packed because she is just that together.

I’ve gotten more photos from the Birthday weekend and… They will not be posted. Ok well… Maybe one:

More has been written about the weekend and can be read here and here including a photo of Wesley Snipes taken at Seacrets.

See you in September.

It was kinda funny when we were at Fager’s because I received an email from the married dude from about a month prior.  I was a bit drunk and happened to be at the same place we shook our groove thing together.  The funny thing is dancing with him was amazing and no one this past weekend could hold a candle to him but this chick doesn’t deal with married dudes and I’m even swearing off separated guys. 

Well… right now I’m just not worrying about dating at all.  Back in June I happened to talk to an old boyfriend who was at a point in his life where he just wanted to hang out with people.  He is so right!  I want to hang out with people and meet new people… All kinds of people.  Even a woman I work with today was saying her friends are freaks and I said, “Hey, let’s hang out!”  So we are pulling together everyone we know to meet up at the Maryland Renaissance Festival during Scottish Weekend… On Sunday September 14th.  Come meet us at the White Hart Tavern.

So this week my friend JB is in town and he hasn’t been here for two years.  I ended up in Old Town on Monday and got to see him.  Imagine not seeing one of your best girlfriends for two years.  I swear if he lived on East coast or I lived on the West coast we would probably be hanging out all the time and I mean drinking and watching our favorite shows.  He’s just so easy to hang out with like when we were in Trader Joe’s and I was perusing the wines, he came up behind me and grabbed my back.  I didn’t flinch and he says, “Awww I wanted to scare you.”

I said, “I’m used to people touching me… A lot, lately.”

What was really funny was this woman standing near by watching us.  I could see out of the corner of my eye she was laughing and having fun with it all.

Tuesday, Mrs. M and I picked up our bridesmaids dresses and it was much better than than I expected and they fixed it so I’ll be able to keep the pups in check.  I was then able to pick up this HOT top I was eyeing and for half off.  Woohoo!

Tonight I met up with JB, Shortie and PSUAcoustician.  This is such a great group of people and we would get to laughing so hard I’m sure we were disturbing people in the restaurant.  JB treated me to dinner but when I pulled out my change purse, to offer the tip, he started his incredible infectious laugh.  I knew exactly why he was laughing and I’m amazed I had never noticed it before.  My change purse is kinda squishy and ball-sac like.

Then he said it… The thing that had him really cracking up:

“It’s Chubby? “

… And this was after he felt my Sasquatch Patch… The hairy patch I missed on my leg when shaving this morning.  One day growth hairy!  He couldn’t decide which was funnier: The term Sasquatch Patch or the fact that I was the only one who could feel the hair.

JB is leaving tomorrow and I’m very sad.  It wasn’t nearly enough time.  Too bad he didn’t arrive early enough to hang with us at the beach. 

JB,
Please know how much you mean to me and I’m happy you are in my life.  Maybe Minnie Red and I should move to San Diego?  I’d finally get to meet your better half and maybe we could rent a room from you?

I’ve decided to help with Nicole’s Bachlorette missions so I climbed on the platform with her to do the pole dancing.  Notice the cup?

I don’t know why I’m making that face and I vaguely remember the flower in my hair.  Oh and that’s Colton… One of the Lacrosse Boys. Notice the cup?

I’m over heated from dancing and trying to use the glow necklace they gave us as a headband. 

Saturday afternoon at Seacrets and drinking again.  The drinking was the only thing helping us feel better after the previous evening. Notice the cups?

These people were nice enough to offer us their table so I took a photo op and he decided to show off his tattoo. I gave them a cup.

The cousins arrived and bought me some shots.  We tried to get a family photo but Pink Shorts dude wanted in on the photo.

When he heard it was my 40th Birthday he said, “You need a 21 yr old to just JACK HAMMER you!“  Then he did his impression of a jack hammer.  We took a picture together before one of the cousins ran him off. Ends up Sis knows him but he did not get a cup.

We finally got the family photo.

Mrs. M and I left Seacrets early and missed Wesley Snipes but we had good reason… Crabs! 

We pre-ordered the crabs which meant there was a specified time to pick them up.  We also did the set up so everyone could cop a squat and pick the crabs as soon as they got back from Seacrets.  Here I’m doing my best Vanna White impression before dropping the crab down the front of me and covering me in Old Bay. 

We cleaned up and headed back to Seacrets.  In the midst of it all we stopped to watch Phelps win yet another Gold Medal.  People were yelling and screaming and it was all so exciting but I’m just getting my hearing back.

Our evening at Seacrets was another fun night except for when I gave them a scare when I disappeared.  I was being lead out of Seacrets to a cooler spot with my dance partner but I refused to leave.  We found a quiet spot and hung out.  I was drunk off my ass but still had my wits about me… somewhat.  I think my goal was to scare him off by biting him but he bit me back. Imelda soon found me and I feared she would kick his ass.  I don’t think he was too happy when I left.  Sorry dude… It was fun while it lasted but at least you got a cup.

I was promptly sent home probably for fear of what I would do next.  It didn’t take me long to get into bed but I was up about an hour later when I noticed there was more than just Sis and I in the bed.  Motz, Shortie and Nicole had climbed in too.  It was cozy but Motz was trying to get Sis to take her earrings out for her.  Poor Motz had the worst hangover the next day.  It seems the pizza at Seacrets did her in.  At least Liz was there to help a Sistah out.

There are still more pictures on the way but not sure what I will be able to post.  There is a lot of imcriminating evidence of yours truly acting the fool.  Oh yes even more than what I have posted here.

To everyone that that came I can’t thank you enough for such an amazing weekend.  I’m beginning to think we should do this every year.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!

Last weekend Shortie came with me down to the O.C. I feared Shortie would be disappointed since we would be hitting happy hour and I would probably be asleep by 9 or 10pm.

My weekends consist of having a few drinks, sleep, get up early walk the boards, sleep, beach time, sleep, happy hour, sleep. So I think you get the point. At the beach Red gets some serious relax/sleep time.

After last weekend I’ve been unable to catch up on my sleep since Shortie and I ended up closing the bars both Friday and Saturday night.

Shortie and I arrived and immediately went over to Macky’s to try and grab a table for when Mom and Dad joined us. I ordered Da Bucket of Orange Crush figuring Shortie would not be able to taste the alcohol.  She rarely drinks and when she does its usually because it doesn’t taste like alcohol. Da Bucket grabbed the attention of the table of guys next to us and so the dialogue began.

The Folks joined us but only stayed for a few drinks before Shortie and I ordered our second Bucket. As soon as they left we were pulled into this group of guys and quite literally because they picked up our table and brought it over to theirs.

We had fun hanging with them at Mackey’s and soon they were off to Fager’s Island and asked us to go too. Shortie and I agreed we needed to clean up first since we had no make up on and were in our crappy driving clothes.

I had never been to Fager’s Island and didn’t know what to expect but it was like walking through a jungle to get to the front door. I was surprised to find it had an older crowd but that changed later in the evening. First thing was first and I ordered Shortie and I each an Orange Crush to keep the alcohol flowing in our systems. We hadn’t walked five feet before we bumped into the guys. The first thing they noticed was my glass was nearly empty (yes, already). Shortie piped up and said, “Why haven’t any of you bought her another one yet?“

Before I knew it I had another Orange Crush in my hand and then the night really got started. There was more alcohol and things got a little fuzzy. With that much alcohol we couldn’t help but shake our groove thing. I don’t know how long we were out on that dance floor but it was a great workout.

Before we knew it the bar was closing and it seems I’ve been doing a lot of that lately after a recent conference in Orlando. I thought for sure I was too old for this but this old chick was kickin it.

Saturday brought the hangover, time on the wave runner and sleeping on the beach. We were ready by 5 and headed to Fish Tales to meet up with WW, his girlfriend and her two daughters. They lasted til about 8 before the girls were done and they scooted them back to the hotel.

So we headed back to the condo so we could walk to Seacrets. Seems there were all sorts of friends at the beach that weekend and the plan was to meet up with them at Seacrets. I hadn’t seen Chrissy in YEARS and her and her hubby had a chance to get out without the kids and Seacrets is a favorite of hers so it wasn’t hard to get her to catch up with us. YDH was in town with his girl and his buddy Al.

Seacrets was packed and most of us were geared up for dancing in the room with the bouncy floor. You just need to stand there and you’ll bounce due to everyone else jumping up and down. The whole night was crazy and after Chrissy left and before YDH left the guys, who walked us home the previous evening, showed up looking for Shortie and I. The night was nearly over and everyone was pretty hammered.

He said to me: ”I have the keys and I’m taking you outta here for some alone time. I have a cab waiting outside.”

“There’s a ton of cabs outside… Always, and there’s no way I’m leaving my wing-girl.”

This dude was so drunk he could barely keep his eyes open but he continued, “Come on I’ll have you back in 30 minutes.”

“You’re so drunk you couldn’t even get it up in 30 minutes.“

I had expected him to behave something like this the previous evening but he didn’t, he was a perfect gentleman. At this point he was obviously trying to get some before the weekend was out and you can’t blame a guy for trying. Dude was so drunk and I was pretty snockered so we weren’t going to agree and I wasn’t going anywhere with him. So what do two chicks do in a situation like this? We ditched em. I know pretty juvenile of us but at this point in my life I don’t have to deal with anything that I don’t want to deal with and we were ALL pretty drunk.

Shortie and I hightailed it outta there and back to the condo. I wasn’t even slowed when at some point I accidentally slammed my hand against a wall. I thought I had scraped it up but I didn’t and it was killing me even though I was drunk.

There were numerous calls wondering where we were. Sounding something like “RED! RED! Pick up! Why you do me like that?”

“Pick up“? This isn’t like a home answering machine. I did call back and left a message telling him I just didn’t feel like dealing with his drunk ass.

Sunday brought another hangover but not quite as bad. Shortie and I did some beach time and when the strap from the chair tugged on my hand I nearly hit the roof. I had forgotten about slamming my hand and Shortie and I knew we would have to piece together some of the weekends events on the drive home.

Mom told Shortie she was welcome anytime especially since I seemed to have more fun with her than The Folks. Shortie said, “I don’t know, I seem to get Red into trouble.”

Mom said, “Good!”

Orange Crush
1 1/2 oz. Vodka
3/4 oz. Triple Sec
Orange Juice

Combine vodka and triple sec in an old fashioned glass filled with ice, fill with orange juice and stir.

**Note:  The original post has been modified upon finding out that ALL of those guys ARE married with children including the dawgs who were hitting on Shortie and I.  We were unaware of this and want no part of it.  I guess our instincts to ditch them were right-on.

Fortunately, I was able to capture it.  This was at least five years ago and my camera was the first digital camera I ever had.  It by no means has the capablities of the digital cameras today, but it got the job done.

So I’m at this wedding in Massachusets when they cleared the dance floor.  A chair was brought out and they had the Groom take the seat.  He was approached by the Bride’s Sister-In -Law and what happened next just shocked the crap out of my friends and I.

But that was not the end of it… The Bride wanted to get in on the action.

The days of throwing the bouquet or the garter are gone.  The newest pastime is for the women to give the Groom a lap dance.

He has recently experienced a loss that has hurt him deeply and expressed himself so eloquently and completes it with a message I seem to keep seeing recently.

I mention this and give you the link for several reasons: